Today, I am entirely responsible for the path in destiny, in my future, that I will take.
I've thrown away the last year and a half; a month ago, the possibility of not being able to attain early acceptance into university hit. I was told that I would get a mark of "incomplete" for my first term Spanish 12 mark. I was told that this would prevent me from obtaining early acceptance. "Fine," I said, because this would be the culmination of all the let-down I have done in the last four years.
On Tuesday I was told that, in English, a subject that I have traditionally done very well in, I was not writing to the best of my ability. I knew this was true. I knew that I could have done as well as any of the top-grade students in the class. I didn't. I let my willpower slip to the calls of lethargy and learned that I currently sit at an 84.
Of History and Literature, I have no qualms because there are no problematic issues that have arisen.
Today, I learned that I can blame nobody but my self if I am to fail in restoring my grades to their rightful place, above the threshhold that separates the A's and the B's.
To speak of Spanish, I was told that I will be able to receive a mark in the upcoming report card, narrowly avoiding the "incomplete", if I am to show that I have completed the work I said I have. "It will only take a minute," I was told.
Of English, our short-story essays were returned. I had not done mine until the day it was due. I expected mediocrity and resolved that I would get nothing more. I was surprised; I had scored a 91. To tell of truth, I was also told that I would be able to salvage an A in the course if I perform well on the exam.
These two instances are not just coincidences, I feel, but some sort of twisted providence that gives me hope. It gives me the necessity to place my future into my own hands. For the first time in years, it feels almost tangible.
Tonight, I will give my time to preparing for these efforts. I have sixteen hours before this day of judgment. An almost overflowing amount of coffee is by my side, as is my music to keep me awake and alive.
To quote Churchill:
"We shall go on to the end [...] we shall never surrender!"
I've thrown away the last year and a half; a month ago, the possibility of not being able to attain early acceptance into university hit. I was told that I would get a mark of "incomplete" for my first term Spanish 12 mark. I was told that this would prevent me from obtaining early acceptance. "Fine," I said, because this would be the culmination of all the let-down I have done in the last four years.
On Tuesday I was told that, in English, a subject that I have traditionally done very well in, I was not writing to the best of my ability. I knew this was true. I knew that I could have done as well as any of the top-grade students in the class. I didn't. I let my willpower slip to the calls of lethargy and learned that I currently sit at an 84.
Of History and Literature, I have no qualms because there are no problematic issues that have arisen.
Today, I learned that I can blame nobody but my self if I am to fail in restoring my grades to their rightful place, above the threshhold that separates the A's and the B's.
To speak of Spanish, I was told that I will be able to receive a mark in the upcoming report card, narrowly avoiding the "incomplete", if I am to show that I have completed the work I said I have. "It will only take a minute," I was told.
Of English, our short-story essays were returned. I had not done mine until the day it was due. I expected mediocrity and resolved that I would get nothing more. I was surprised; I had scored a 91. To tell of truth, I was also told that I would be able to salvage an A in the course if I perform well on the exam.
These two instances are not just coincidences, I feel, but some sort of twisted providence that gives me hope. It gives me the necessity to place my future into my own hands. For the first time in years, it feels almost tangible.
Tonight, I will give my time to preparing for these efforts. I have sixteen hours before this day of judgment. An almost overflowing amount of coffee is by my side, as is my music to keep me awake and alive.
To quote Churchill:
"We shall go on to the end [...] we shall never surrender!"
good luck johnray! you can do it! :)
ReplyDelete